Leo and Sugar Don't Mix
by Tamale-demigod-horse girl
Summary: One day, while hyper on sugar, Leo decides Camp Jupiter needs a little excitement. But things don't go according to plan. Set after HoO. Oneshot! :)


**A/N: This is my first story, so go easy on me please! **

Leo was sick of Camp Jupiter.

Seriously, the whole camp was so uptight that Leo figured that they were made of metal or something. Nobody had any fun. Nobody laughed, or smiled, or told jokes, (Except himself of course) and nobody did any kind of pranking.

Leo decided it was his duty to fix that.

So after inhaling 117 sugar cookies, 256 cups of coffee, and 126,344 doughnuts, Leo decided it was time to put his plan into action.

It involved several cans of spray paint, one pegasus and possibly getting murdered by Reyna.

"HEY JASON! MY BUDDY HOW'S IT GOING TODAY?"

Jason frowned. "Did you have too much sugar again, Leo?"

"NO."

"Where's Percy? I told him that you weren't allowed to have any more sugar!"

"PERCY IS NICE HE GIVES ME DOUGHNUTS AND COOKIES AND MAGICAL DRINKS AND…"

"What's going on here?"

Reyna's sharp voice stopped Leo in his tracks. Even extremely hyper, Leo knew better than to mess with her.

_To heck with it, _Leo thought, _Reyna's going to kill me soon anyway. _

"SO ANYWAY I ATE A LOT OF SUGAR BUT DON'T GET MAD JASON BECAUSE SUGAR IS YUMMY YOU SHOULD EAT SUGAR MORE OFTEN TOO BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL SERIOUS ALL THE TIME YOU USED TO BE FUNNY BUT NOW REYNA CORRUPTED YOU AGAIN!"

"Excuse me?!" Reyna's voice rose an octave. Jason backed away from Reyna, although her glare wasn't aimed at him.

"I'LL JUST GO OVER THERE NOW!" Leo decided that it was time to get on with his plan. Leaving the praetors behind, he sprinted off toward the stables.

He didn't think Reyna was following him, but Leo hid in one of the unicorn's stalls anyway. The unicorn looked at him like, _WTF Man?, _and proceeded to kick Leo in the face.

"OWWWWEEEEEEEE!" Leo sobbed, clutching his face. He was sort of aware that he was probably attracting attention, but all that sugar was muddling his mind. Logic slipped from his mind. "YOU STUPID PONY! THAT HUUUUUUUUURRT!"

The unicorn snorted and pawed the ground again, getting ready for another kick.

Leo was angry now. No PONY was going to get the best of him! Muttering curses, he scooped up a can of pink spray paint that he was going to use re-color Reyna's horse (Epic plan revealed!), and sprayed the paint in the Uni's face. Remembering that it was about to kick him, he threw himself out of the stall and landed face- first in a pile of manure.

Leo briefly mulled over the grim fact that unicorn poop didn't smell any better than regular poop, when a hoof kicked him in the head _again_.

"GAHHHHHHHHHH!" Stumbling to his feet, he prepared to shoot the pink spray again, as many times as needed.

And he came face to face with Reyna's pegasus, Skipio. The horse did NOT look happy.

"Uhhh… he… he… heh…" Leo held up his spray paint.

Skipio snorted, then flew out the stable doors.

"Okay…." Leo watched the horse fly up over the camp. "That was random."

As if on cue, the entire herd of unicorns busted down their stall doors and galloped outside, leaving Leo covered in even more filth.

"RANDOMNESS IS TAKING OVER MY LIFE!" he wailed, lighting his hands on fire.

Exactly two minutes later, the stable was a pile of ash.

"Oh, crap!" Leo frantically attempted to put out the remaining flames. "What have I done?"

Outside, it was mayhem. Unicorns were running wildly throughout the city, knocking over food stands, smashing into chariots, and generally causing mass panic. Terminus was screaming insults as they galloped by, and he thought he could see Hazel trying to calm them all down.

Glancing around nervously, Leo made a mad dash for the Argo ll, hoping to wait the craziness out and not get caught.

"LEO VALDEZ!" a girl roared.

Leo froze, to scared to move. He knew that voice.

Reyna stood in front of him on Skipio, who seemed to be smirking, if horses can do that.

"WHAT IS GODS NAME IS GOING ON HERE? WHY ARE YOU COVERED IN FILTH? WHY IS THERE UNICORNS RUNNING AROUND EVERYWHERE? WHERE DID THE _STABLE_ GO?!"

"How did you find me?" Leo shrieked (like a fangirl).

Skipio stared at him.

"THAT HORSE TATTLED ON ME?"

Reyna wasn't listening. "First, you blow up the camp with your missiles. Then, you set the stable on fire! What is WRONG with you?"

Leo sobbed, "Blame Percy! He kept giving me sugar! It's not my fault- my brain was overwhelmed by the hyperness!"

"Percy will be punished as well. As for you, Valdez, you are going in my DUNGEON!"

Leo was impressed. "You have a dungeon? Cool! I didn't know you guys were that strict! How many people are down there? Or are they all dead now? Are there any lights? How often do they bring food? Do I get a bed? How long do I have to stay in there? Can I bring my coat to put supplies in? Will Percy go down there with me? He deserves it too, you know."

Reyna looked appropriately confused. "Okay…?"

"Does that mean I'm free to go after all? Great? I'm going to go catch up with Jason, see you around! Be sure to punish Percy for creating this whole mess!" Leo sprinted off toward his ship.

"VALDEZ!"

Leo ran for his life. Literally.

**A/N: Okay, so this was random, but I wanted to do a funny one. I love reviews, but no flames please! Would like some constructive criticism though! **

**- Tamale- girl **


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